Integrity

You can't keep your true self hidden forever; before long you'll be exposed. You can't hide behind a religious mask forever; sooner or later the mask will slip and your true face will be known. You can't whisper one thing in private and preach the opposite in public; the day's coming when those whispers will be repeated all over town.
luke 12:2-3

Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time; wait till the Lord comes. He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of men's hearts. At that time each will receive his praise from God.
1 cor. 4:5

i'm trying to choose my words wisely about the previous text. i've been hearing so much about the way others are acting and the noise which is coming out of their mouths. i say 'noise' because that's all it is, a resounding gong or clanging cymbal (1 cor. 13:1) i am not without sin, nor do i claim to have it all together. my mouth speaks plenty of noise. i often speak careless words which pierce the hearts of my listeners without even realizing that i've said something to offend them. and in saying these uncouth words, my witness becomes void and useless (ineffective).

so how does a person confront someone who speaks brashly nearly all the time? what words calm a harsh tongue? how can love break this cycle of an uncouth spirit? what is the best way to tell someone their words are hurting others? or that they have offended many people in a congregation? and what about when the person who needs to be confronted is of a 'higher' spiritual level than those who have been hurt?

this is a great lesson for me. i see how unthoughtful words penetrate the hearts of those listening. i see how words without love and compassion destroy a Christian witness. i see how quickly i can fall into the same trap. i'm beginning to understand my short-comings more and more. humility is the key - and arrogance is the downfall. simply because i have been a Christian for many years does not justify me to elevate myself above others. without love my life is meaningless. all my words and action should point to Christ, and if they don't then i am failing Him. oh how conviction hurts. 'wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.' prov. 27:6

Jesus,
forgive me for being so quick to point out others splinters when my plank is so obtrusive. i want to not judge - to allow You to judge, but i keep falling into this trap. my mind is so quick to falsely assume so many things about others. i know that only thru You can i be made whole with a new outlook on others. may Your transforming power restore my brokenness. God, You know who i'm praying for. You know the words which were spoken which have penetrated so many hearts. i pray over this person who said these uncouth words. may You convict this person, drawing this person back into Your loving arms of forgiveness. may this person be sensitive to Your Spirit - speaking words of encouragement and love. may this person speak with words which come directly from You (1 pet. 4:11), not from the hidden feelings within this person. help us to be forgiving people. help us to love without reserve, even when we desire to hold feelings of hurt against others. break us from holding grudges. let us be people of hope and love. may Your light shine in new ways. i pray for opportunities to share my faith. may You open my eyes to see these opportunities, and may i have the courage to speak the Truth in love. let my life be for You a fragrance, pleasing and acceptable.
in Jesus Name

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*Tara *Laurel *Hope

Keeping the Focus

I have set the LORD always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.
ps. 16:8

Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed.
1 peter 1:13

Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.
col. 3:2

Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you.
prov. 4:25

Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith.
heb. 12:2a

i'm just thinking about ways i can set the Lord always before me, fix my eyes on Jesus, prepare my mind for action. how do you do it? i'd love to hear from you.

Father,
i want to fix my eyes on You. i want You to be continually set before me. i desire for You to be in my gaze at all times. ..but i'm quickly discovering that i can't do it on my own. i need Your guidance and help. Holy Spirit, come and fill me so i can be ever filld with Your presence. let me obey my spirit nature rather than my sinful nature. where i am disobedient, i pray for conviction. where i am tempted to step to the left of right on the narrow path, i pray for conviction and knowledge to stand up against the temptation.
in Jesus Name ~ Amen!

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*Janice *Crystal *Laura

Demanded/Asked

"That servant who knows his master's will and does not get ready or does not do what his master wants will be beaten with many blows. But the one who does not know and does things deserving punishment will be beaten with few blows. From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked."
luke 12:47-48

does anyone understand the concept of the Word being like a double-edged sword? well, that is how i feel about these verses. sometimes when hearing a Word from my heavenly Father my heart can barely take it all in. right now i'm just trying to digest what all is involved in these verses.

maybe the best way to put my thoughts into this blog this morning is just to ask questions. so...

*do i know my Master's will?
*what am i doing to get ready?
*am i doing what my Master wants me to be doing?
*do i really believe that i could experience many blows for not doing what Dad wants me to do?
*who doesn't know my Dad?
*so, even those without knowing my Dad's will will be beaten?
*what is worthy of deserving punishment?
*what have i been given?
*what am i being demanded of?
*who is demanding me to do anything?
*am i giving without reserve?
*do i give generously or grudgingly?
*am i sharing my gifts?
*what has been entrusted to me?
*who has entrusted it to me?
*who is asking for me to share what has been entrusted?

lately i've been feeling bored with life - a sense of discontentment or unfulfillment. i've been missing something. now i'm beginning to understand what is missing. i haven't felt that much has been asked of me; not much has been demanded of me. "live up to the expectations" life of the mediocre... so i'm searching my Father's will and getting ready for His return and striving to do what He wants me to do. i'm asking for opportunities to be asked and demanded from. i want to share my gifts, to be challenged to give when i don't want to.

hey Dad,
it is awesome to worship and serve the Lord of the universe. You have it all together. Your power is perfect. You are constant. Father, sometimes i get so wrapped up in what i want that i forget to see what You are asking of me. i read Your Word hoping to get something out of it, but forget that You are speaking to me as a friend, not always as a teacher. Jesus, i know that You are great and Your grace can make all things new. well, Jesus, i pray for You to flood my life with newness. i'm tired of going thru life without a sense of high expectation. let me see what You are asking and demanding of me. these gifts that You've given, well, i want to use them. i want to grow up - i'm tired of wearing a diaper. how about some of that real Food? i know that You hear when Your kids cry out to You. You are close to the broken-hearted. may this prayer reach Your ears, encouraging Your delight and honor. i want to be a moon for You. i want Your saltiness to spice my life. what's the new mission? what's the new plan? what are you going to ask of me today, Father? what do You want with me? i desires to do what pleases You. i want to get ready for Your return - i can't wait to see You! i want to share Your kindness, gentleness, compassion, humility and patience with others. i'm so excited about what is about to happen!
in Jesus' Name ~ Amen!

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*Derrick *Flora *Raymond

Ticklin' Ears

jer. 28

so many times we want to hear what will make us feel good, instead of desiring to know the truth. jeremiah was running into this dilemma. a prophet named hananiah from gibeon had entered into jeremiah's path. hananiah prophesied that within two years the chosen people would be freed from the captivity of the babylonians. this was good news to jeremiah, the priests and all the assembly. jeremiah even said, "Amen! so be it! may God do just as you have said."(v. 6) but then jeremiah adds a trailer onto his words. he says, "from early times the prophets who preceded you and me have prophesied war, disaster and plague against many countries and great kingdoms. but the prophet who prophesies peace will be recognized as one truly sent by the LORD only if his prediction comes true." (v. 8-9)

to me it sounds like jeremiah was thrilled with the news of the babylonians yoke of slavery to be broken. how could you not be excited? but jeremiah also stands on his faith, knowing that God sent him to the people to prophesy truth - of wars, disaster and plague. his faith in God and in his calling persuaded him to speak the truth, even when his heart was moved to believe this new prophet.

later in the chapter, jeremiah receives a word from the Lord about hanaiah. the Lord tells jeremiah that hananiah was speaking falsely, and that the slavery would only get worse instead of better. so jeremiah went to hananiah with this message, "Listen, Hananiah! The LORD has not sent you, yet you have persuaded this nation to trust in lies. therefore, this is what the LORD says: 'I am about to remove you from the face of the earth. This very year you are going to die, because you have preached rebellion against the LORD .' " (v. 15-16)

just think about what jeremiah might have been feeling? one moment he is thrilled to death that the Lord is going to rescue the people from slavery...and in the next breath he is instructed that the slavery is going to get worse. bummer, huh? talk about emotional rush!

well, the last verse of the chapter tells us that hananiah did die - once again affirming "Your word, O LORD , is eternal; it stands firm in the heavens." (ps. 119:89, is. 40:8)

hey Lord,
it is good to come into Your presence this morning. thanks for sharing this passage with me. You have an incredible way of opening my eyes to see truth. thanks. Jesus, sometimes i want my ears to be tickled instead of desiring the Truth. it's often easier to listen to the world around me instead of obey and trust Your Word to be the only Truth, inerrant, a rock standing firm forever. i confess that i've been moved by what others have said instead of being grounded in Your Truth. may Your grace flood over me, giving me strength to be confident in Your Word. i pray for the truth in my heart to control my emotions and thoughts. i stumble so often in this area. i know that Your grace is sufficient for me. You've proved Yourself time and time again. may You receive the glory for transforming my doubt into faith. have Your way, Lord. sensitize me to Your truth.
in Jesus' Name ~ Amen!

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*AJ *Stacy *Shannon

BROWN You are usually very straight-forward. You have a passive personality and enjoy nurturing those around you. You are very grounded and prefer to keep things simple and honest. Find out your color at Quiz Me!

Christ in Me

I in them and you in me. May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.
john 17:23

mimi niwe ndani yao, nawe uwe ndani yangu; naomba wakamilishwe na kuwa kitu kimoja, ili ulimwengu upate kujua kwamba wewe ulinituma, na kwamba unawapenda wao kama unavyonipenda mimi.
john 17:23

i confess that i've slacked off in my morning devotions. i've sleeped in for about 2 months now. yesterday i committed to denise that i would get up early to have my quite time. life is too busy to not have a holy/sacred time w/ my Father. so this morning i woke early and entered into His presence. man, it was great! it had been far too long.

these verses remind me that Christ is in Me, and only thru Him am i able to be brought to complete unity with Him. i need to converse with Him, worship Him, meditate in Him, and mostly allow Him to work thru me. He is to be my Head, my Heart, and my Mouth. thru His strength i can do anything, but without Him i am nothing. He is my all in all, the very breath i breathe.

'who i am that Lord of all the earth would care to know my name, would care to feel my hurt? who am i, that the Bright and Morning Star would choose to light the way to my ever wandering heart? not because of who i am, but because of what You've done. Not because of what i've done, but because of who You are.' - Who am I, Casting Crowns. i love that song. nearly makes me cry every time i hear it. just reminds me that God does care about my feelings, no matter if i'm upset, hurt and spacey!

Bright and Morning Star,
You're worthy of my praise. i adore You. You have a way of softening my heart, caressing my fears, and brightening my mood. it is wonderful to have You as my Counselor and Stronghold. You have a hold on me. Friend, i've slacked on my devotions. please forgive me for not giving You my firstfruit of my day. You've blessed me in so many ways, and the least i can do is give You some of what i have to offer. Thanks for pulling me out of my apathetic attitude. You are my motivation. i love You. may You open a way for me to share the Good News of Your salvation and Lordship. You are mighty in battle, able to tear down the thickest of all walls. Your Message still rings loud and clear. it is great to be alive!
in Jesus' Name ~ Amen!

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*Flora *Anderson *Carla

Taking Time to be Loved on

The LORD your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with his love, He will rejoice over you with singing.
zeph. 3:17

Be still, and know that I am God.
ps. 46:10

Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for Him.
ps. 37:7

this weekend i attended a ski trip with some of the youth from st. paul. it was a great trip and God amazingly answered our prayers. He gave us safe travels, no injuries, and moments to worship Him. overall the trip was incredible!

during saturday's worship service God laid it on my heart that there is more to Christianity than just 'push, push, push'. i get so wrapped in trying to become holy that i miss the joy along the journey. my personal expectations don't allow myself to just allow God to delight over me, to love on me. and i'm only beginning to understand that those times when i rest in Him - i consciously worship Him with my mind and soul and body. it's is a new, refreshing way for me to worship. i tend to worship Him thru service/actions...but that is a different kind of worship.

on a different note, my friend Kimberly is travelling to China on Jan. 29th. she'll be traveling with others who are sharing the Good News of Jesus Christ to those who may have never before heard. and she found out yesterday that she is also travelling to tanzania, africa, this summer on a trip with The Jesus Film. i spoke with her last night and she is soooo excited about these trips. please keep her in your prayers as she takes the Message out of our country. thanks

Amazing Creator,
You know everything about me - even when i sit and when i rise, when i go out and when i lay down; nothing is hidden from You. You are always near me. Father, i am so glad that You went with us on the ski trip. thanks for revealing Yourself in different ways. it's amazing how You move thru the hearts of Your people. thanks for speaking. may You continue to share Your Message of Good News to others so they can rejoice in You. thanks for motivating Kimberly and others to take Your Message to unreached people. may You travel before them and continue to prepare a way for the Message to be heard. may You be glorified for this trip. protect them from the evil One. give them eyes to see Your spiritual battle. equip them to fight with Your weapons. You are still King of all kings and Lord of all lords.
in Jesus' Name ~ Amen!

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*Kimberly *Joe *Beth

Sober thinking

For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you.
romans 12:3

So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall!
1 cor.10:12

everyone should buzz over to Denise's blog. she's posted some great questions which we all should ask ourselves. wouldn't be me life-changing if we could daily questions ourselves with questions such as these? that's keeping Christ in focus at all times.

Gracious Counselor
i'm humbled by these profound questions. i want You to search me and open my eyes and heart to know the truth of the matter. i want to be honest with You and myself. don't let me think to highly of myself, please. keep me in check. use whatever methods You need to to get me to see where i'm out of check.thanks for Your guidance.
in Jesus Name ~ Amen!

i'll be out until next tuesday, the 20th.

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*Tania's mom *Trevor *Sean

Protection and Comfort

But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy. Spread your protection over them, that those who love your name may rejoice in you. For surely, O LORD , you bless the righteous; you surround them with your favor as with a shield.
Ps. 5:11-12

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Is. 41:10

in two days i'm traveling 8 hours with some youth from st. paul. since i don't know how to ski, nor do some others traveling on this trip, i'm praying for safety. does anyone else understand this concept? i'm 27 years old, tried skiing one time 2 years ago and failed miserably, and now i'm going back for more abuse. perhaps this time i'll get it... maybe... so this is one way i'm coveting your prayers

another way is for my family. i was told this morning my great aunt, Agnus Boone, passed away. she was in a great deal of pain and was struggling very much, so the death comes as a relief to those assisting her. i just don't know where she stood with the Lord. i never heard her say anything about Christianity, nor did she ever attend church. only God knows. but it makes me questions who else do i know that doesn't know the Joy that i know? by the way, i won't be able to attend the funeral because i live 1300 miles from there, and i'll be hitting the slopes.

thanks for Your prayers.

Most Holy God,
there is a time for joy and a time for mourning - and for me the times seem to come in one package. i'm excited about the ski trip, but bummed about Aggie's death. i praise You for allowing me to trust You with my feelings. may You wrap Your arms of protection over those traveling on the ski trip, and Your comforting arms around my grieving family. may You create a way for these people to witness You. may their eyes and hearts be open to meeting You and knowing You in a personal way. Holy Spirit, i pray for You to convict them of their sin, and embrace Your love which surpassing all understanding. move in a way which we all know it's You, the all-powerful One. draw us close to You. thanks for Your love over me.
in Jesus' Name~ Amen.

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*my dad's side of the family *ski group *David

The Exodus

Exodus 7 - 12

as some of you already know, one of my resolutions is to read thru the Bible this year. well, at the rate i'm going, i will be completed with it in june. :) so far i've gotten thru the lives of Joseph, Isaac and Jacob. and now i just finished reading about the plagues and how God hardened the heart of pharoah. (can't you just hear that silly song we used to sing..."pharoah, pharoah...oh baby..let my people GO! uugh!!! yah yah yah yah yah?)

i don't know what type of life pharoah lived in Egypt. all i know is that he lived in africa, had some kids and was a slave driver. he was hard-hearted - a real jerk! and God's people were forced into slave labor. it's a long story how they originally got there, but it has to do with Jacob's brothers selling him into slavery. they jacob bailed them out later on. that just a brief description of how they got to africa.

so this pharoah guy... he has heard the warning of moses and aaron about the water turning into blood, infestation of flog, gnats, flies, diseases, livestock killed, his firstborn child killed. wouldn't you think he would get the bigger picture to get this group of people out of your land? i can only imagine the power of God to keep pharoah from a change of heart.

after the death of his son, finally pharoah decides to let the israelite people return to their land to worship their God. so the israelites pack up and leave - everything is going fine. but you know pharoah - doesn't know the Truth when he gets stuck face to face with it. he sends his best fighting men out after them. well, if you don't know what happens - they all die in the red sea. God opens a way for the israelites to cross the bottom of the sea on dry ground. how cool is that? so pharoah's army also goes into the sea, thinking they'll capture the israelites. but no. they all drown. God again watches over His people. so why did God allow the israelites to remain in egypt of so long under the horrible conditions? why did God harden pharoah's heart for so long. i don't know how much time passed from when moses and aaron first visited pharoah, warning him about the plague of blood and the final warning of passover, but quite a lot of time passed. in total the israelites were in egypt 430 years. (exodus 12:43)

Father,
sometimes Your plan seems so unrealistic from my simple understand, but You have a magnificent way of working everything out. oh for those people who were walking in the red sea with walls of water on both sides of them and a cloud of Your glory in front of them. i praise You for opening ways for people to be amazed at how You work. You still work miracles. thanks for being as close to us as You were to them. thanks for protecting them from the army which attempted to attack. You became their salvation, and You've done the same for me. Thanks.
in Jesus' name~Amen!

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*Mike *Lucy *Ashton

A Time for Rejoicing

I love you, O LORD , my strength. The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I call to the LORD , who is worthy of praise, and I am saved from my enemies.
Psalm 18:1-3

as i sit here trying to figure out what to blog about, i'm reminded that i've slacked in praising Him. i get so wrapped up in learning a new lession, that my head forgets to stop and give glory to the One who is teaching me the lessons. sometimes i need a reminder that it's ok to be still and rejoice in Him who has saved me for the death for which i was heading.

it bothers me to sit and do nothing. when i'm relaxing at my house, i always have a book in front on me ...and i am focused in the book. often my roommates are speaking to me and i don't have a clue what's happening because i'm so attentive to the book. and when we go out to eat, if i'm finished with my meal and they are still eating, i'm always grabbing something to fiddle with or to read. i can't just sit still; i have to be doing something. and you can ask them, they will tell you the same thing. i would rather clean my bathroom 5 times a day than to sit and stare at nothing for 10 minutes. that's torture for me. so now that i've rambled on about my short attention span, probably i should re-focus back on to Jesus.

Jesus,
i praise You for always being near me. thanks for waking up w/ me in the morning and for being with me all thru the day. often i'm dense when it comes to Your promptings because i'm so focused on something. i pray that You would sensitize me to Your voice. i want my focus to stay on You, Father, but i fail at this so miserably. draw me close to You. give me eyes to see Your beauty. thanks for sharing this beautiful day with me. thanks the sun and the warmth it brings. may You refresh my soul like the warmth refreshes the land. i want to rest in You. thanks for holding me in Your arms. i love You.
in Jesus' Name ~ Amen!

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*Louise *Misty *Danielle

Confrontations and Backbones

You shouldn't act as if everything is just fine when one of your Christian companions is promiscuous or crooked, is flip with God or rude to friends, gets drunk or becomes greedy and predatory. You can't just go along with this, treating it as acceptable behavior. I'm not responsible for what the outsiders do, but don't we have some responsibility for those within our community of believers? God decides on the outsiders, but we need to decide when our brothers and sisters are out of line and, if necessary, clean house.
1 Cor. 5:11-13

i read these verses and cringe, because i know too often i run from confrontation. i'm a passifist, peace-maker, pansy. these verses clearly point out that we are be bold about standing up for the truth. and when our close 'church' friends are out of line, we need to tactfully reprimand them in love.

and the other side to this is the one being reprimanded. it is a humbling experience to be 'chewed out', 'yelled at', etc. we tend to make every confrontation out to be more than what it was. i'm very guilty of this. i don't do well when others come to me and tell me i've done something wrong. respectfully accepting advice is one way to practice humility...which seems to be an area which Christ is working in my life. ironic that the last words in these verses are 'clean house'.

Christ, i admit i've not confronted others in a way which would please You. i've tucked my tail between my legs and run home too many times. please forgive me for this. i pray for You to equip me with more strength to lovingly reprimand those who are out of bounds. let my words be filled with grace and mercy. and i also admit that i've defended my cause far too many times, instead of humbly accepting the advice. Jesus, i lay this down on the cross. may You use this humble servant. i can't change without Your help. please, come and rescue me from this struggle between flesh and Spirit. i wanna run to You and jump into Your grace. i pray for opportunies to share Your ability thru me. that's a bold prayer, my Friend, but what better way to test and see that i pass the test. i want to achive the goal You have set for me. me others know that I am Your servant and that i chose to follow Your example.
in Jesus' Name ~ Amen!

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*Ann *Eddy *Zach

Confessions

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
1 John 1:9

He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy.
Prov. 28:13

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
James 5:16

"When your people Israel have been defeated by an enemy because they have sinned against you, and when they turn back to you and confess your name, praying and making supplication to you in this temple, then hear from heaven and forgive the sin of your people Israel and bring them back to the land you gave to their fathers."
1 Kings 8:33-34

confessions. all kinds of thoughts come to mind when that word is spoken. first i think of a priest in a wooden closet listening to a sinner. then i think of Christ as my Priest listening to me as i confess my sins before Him. what an incredibly humbling experience to stand before His throne and speak aloud the sins of my life.

but where in my list of confessions do i think of confessing my sins to my companions? it doesn't rank very high. when do i confess my sins to my friends? pretty much never. am i so perfect that i never sin? of course, not. why then do i not obey this command written in the Book? lack of humility. arrogance. pride. "haven't-done-it-in-the-past,-why-start-now?" attitude. God has blessed me with some incredible friends to whom i could confess, but i choose not to open my lips. but this is gonna change. i'm beginning to pray for humility, opportunity to confession to others my sin so they can uphold me by prayer. this year has started out to be quite the soul-searching year, and we are only 8 days into it. expectant to see how it continues.

Jesus,
thanks for bringing these verses into my life so You can continue to change me from the inside-out. thanks for humbling me before Your throne. thanks for the friends whom You've blessed me with. may You have Your way with me. i confess my lack of confession to other to You. i'm on my knees praying for strength and courage to be open and honest about my struggles and sins. God, i don't want to continue to be arrogant and full of pride. i don't want to continue to give two excuses for everything. please open up a way for me to share these confessions w/ someone. prepare someone to hear my heart's confessions. let them be a godly person, someone who knows You and can pray to You. this is new to me, Jesus, and i need Your assurance that this is Your doing. i need You so i can be honest and open, because i've failed so many times before. let me fall in Your grace. i'm expecting You to use this new avenue to display Your grace and mercy. i'm falling fully on You for support, Counselor. and i pray for others who need someone to confess their sins. let us no longer live in the silence of hiding our sins, but let us bring them into Your light. let us know You forgiveness thru friends and confession, and let us be open and honest with You about who we are. may our hearts pour out sins and renounce them. let us not remain sinful.
in Jesus' Name ~ Amen!

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*Kyle *Aaron *Valerie

Sinless

If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.
1 John 1:8

The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? "I the LORD search the heart and examine the mind, to reward a man according to his conduct, according to what his deeds deserve."
Jer. 17:9-10

For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.
Rom. 3:23

sometimes i can be a pompous, arrogant, better-than-thou person. i forget that in weakness Christ's power is made perfect by His grace. (2 Cor. 12:9) i try to cover my short-comings by making excuses. i'm afraid to admit that someone else is right, in fear that i will look bad. i don't spontaneously tell others of my past failures, nor do i tell them of my haunty thoughts which elude my mind. this is my skeleton in the closet - not confessing my sin to one another.

but these verses remind me that i am not alone in the struggle for holiness. all have gone astray - not just me. within the walls of the church are different walls. fear that others will be let down if they find out what i do in my private space, when no one is looking. fear that others will hold it against those who have fallen. fear of being replaced from a powerful position in the church. fear of change. fear of giving into faith, when the evidence hasn't manifested. fear of being called a hypocrit. fear of giving over every area of our lives, so that we can be fully devoted to the work of the Lord. fear of coming into the Light.

our youth often say, "it's so much easier to talk with non-christian friends because they won't look down on me for what i've done. they don't care what i do; they like me no matter what." those are difficult words to swallow, since we are supposed to be the givers of grace. "freely give as you have received." paul goes on to say, "forgive as the Lord forgave you." (Col 3:13) why then are there so many walls in the church? why are people so inclined to tip-toe around church, when their devotion is to another power (sin)? why are we not going after those who are hurting and have built up walls against the people of God? where is our grace and forgiveness?

Jesus,
we need Your grace. we've sinned against You by not giving the grace which You've poured unto us. give us desire to be quick to forgive as You forgave us. let our love for others draw them back into Your loving arms. don't let our 'must-be-perfect' philosophy continue any longer. break us so we crumble before You. lead us to the place where Your grace upholds us. crush our spirits of resentment, bitterness, unforgivness. we've received so much from You, God, and we desire to be more like You. please keep us honest before You. don't let us be deceived any longer by the one You've banished from heaven. we can't forgive without You, Jesus. teach us to be like You.
in Jesus's Name ~ Amen!

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*Kris *Jacqui *Ruth

Purify Your Sin

But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.
1 John 1:6

Moses slaughtered the bull and took some of the blood, and with his finger he put it on all the horns of the altar to purify the altar. He poured out the rest of the blood at the base of the altar. So he consecrated it to make atonement for it.
Lev. 8:15

He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins, and not only for ours but also for the sins of the whole world.
1 John 2:2

the atoning Sacrifice purifies us from our sin. so why don't we speak of this blood more often. yeah, we hear about it when it's time for communion, and we speak of the cup being the blood of the covenant poured out for the forgiveness of our sins... but what about the rest of our lives? once a month doesn't seem sufficient to hear about the blood which purifies us from our sins. shouldn't the topic of blood be continually before us, reminding us that we've been forgiven of all our sins? isn't that the greatest gift God has bestowed upon us? so, why then are we so scared to speak of this blood which contains so much power?

sounds like i hopped up on my soapbox for a minute or two. well, i've heard is said that God manisfests Himself most when His people understand that there is power in His blood, and when His people strive to attain His holiness. i forget where i read that, but i'm challenged now to find the author. our church is great about singing of holiness, but i feel we lack in speaking of the blood. i'm stepping off my box now.

Jesus,
let You blood flow over my heart and cleanse me from my sin. let me never take for granted what You've accomplished on the cross, where You became the atoning Sacrifice for our sins. You've shed Your blood that we may have life in fellowship with You. be praise for drawing us back into a right relationship with You. may our response to Your compassion be striving to live a life of holiness. Holy Spirit, we can't be holy without Your help. we have nothing worthy to offer, but thru Jesus' blood we are made pure. dunk us in Your blood, Jesus, so we can be made pure.
Thru the power of Jesus' blood ~ Amen!

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*Jack *Gail *Lisa

Radiating Light

When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life."
John 8:12

I have come into the world as a light, so that no one who believes in me should stay in darkness.
John 12:46

"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house."
Matt. 5:14-15

my friend, Denise, always makes reference to being a moon, because the moon radiates the glory of the sun. and we are to radiate the glory of the Son; so i guess we should be moons, too.

i'm trying to go verse by verse thru the book of 1 John. so far i made it to verse 5 which says, "God is light; in Him there is no darkness at all." can you imagine living a life without any darkness? i don't think i can because i'm so tainted. my thoughts cannot even fathom that perfection, that holiness. but i want to get to know this Light in a deeper way. perhaps some of His light could rub off onto me. kinda like people who have an amazing ability to lift me out of my bad attitudes. those are the kinds of people i want to hang out with, not those who bring me down.

but i can't stop with hoping His light will rub off onto me. Jesus said that, "You are the light of the world - a city on a hill cannot be hidden!" my responsibility as a Christian, a follower of Jesus Christ, is the radiate His light. if there is any darkness within me, i am responsible for exposing it to the Light. John 3:20 says, "Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed."

Father,
as this new year begins, i want to come into Your glorious Light! i want my life to radiate Your glory, Jesus. i know that You are the Light of the world, and i am responsible for sharing that light with others. i surrender my life to You; "my God turns my darkness into light." (Ps. 18:28) Jesus, "Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." (Ps. 139: 23-24) don't let me hide my shame or darkness from You any longer. open my eyes to see where i am tainted. Holy Spirit, like a double edged sword, i desire You to penetrate my heart, carving away to dark so that Light can shine. please don't let me run from the pain, but stand firm in faith, knowing it is for Your glory that i am made clean.
thru Jesus' Name ~ Amen!

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*Don *Sharon *Audrey

Telling Your Experience

The life appeared; we have seen it and testify to it, and we proclaim to you the eternal life, which was with the Father and has appeared to us.
1 John 1:2

Many of the Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman's testimony, "He told me everything I ever did."
John 4:39>

periodically i'm reminded that i cannot remain silent about my faith. the above references are just a few of the many times people in the Bible tell others of their experience with Jesus. non-believers all across the world are coming to know Him thru the words of others who have experienced Him.

as i look back on 2003, i can name many ways that i've experienced Jesus. a few of them have been *River of Life mission trip with the youth, *many of the youth at St. Paul UMC have dedicated their lives to Christ, *a new spirit of worship is coming alive at St. Paul, *some of the young adult members are making a commitment to be a devoted disciple of Jesus, and *adults are move willing to give of their time and money. but those are the mountain top experiences, and i know that i know Him on a daily basis thru the small happenings and prompting He gives.

this is the beginning of a new year - 2004. ive tried to set a few goals for this new year. i want to experience Jesus more on a daily basis. i want to be more disciplined about journalling. i want to stop biting my nails. i want to get into better shape. i want to read thru the entire bible this year. those are my goals for 2004. there are many more hopes, for which i'm praying.

happy new year, Dad
i'm celebrating You this year. You've already begun some incredible works, some amazingly wonderful deeds. You're my rock. You are able to make a difference, to change cold hearts, to give our church all the financial resources it needs, to restore broken marriages and families, to offer hope to the hopeless and heal all the sickness and disease. Your are able. help me never forget or doubt that You can change anything. You are my God, and i confess my lack of faith in You. i've not prayed for certain situations because i've doubted that You will change it. but this year i want to commit my year to You, for Your glory. may You be the One to receive the praise for enabling me to quit biting my nails, to read Your Word thru its entirety, to become more disciplined about journalling, to get in better shape so i can accomplish more with less difficulty, etc. You are the One whom i worship. let this year be for You a year of worship and commitment. i can't accomplish anything without You, God. i know You hear my prayer, and You desire for me to worship You. it makes my joy complete to bow before You. thanks for calling me out of darkness. i love living in Your light.
in Jesus' Name - Amen!

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*Carlene *Edward *Marn