Wanting a Guitar

You want something but don't get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures. You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.
james 4:2-4

i can't help but laugh after reading this passage. i'm trying to learn how to play the guitar. (the key word is "trying".) anyway, my friend Denise has offered me her guitar to use. well, selfish me keeps wanting my own guitar. i just don't feel right taking her guitar as my own. so i've been searching for prices of guitars, trying to find one which i can afford and appreciate as my own.

denise and i have gone round and round about me getting my own guitar. i don't know why i have been so eager to get one for myself. i think part of the reason is because then if i should break it, i won't feel so guilty. and there is just some pride involved in owning your own things, instead of borrowing from others. (that is a whole different topic: pride.) so, i am without a guitar of my own, and now i have conviction because the Word of my God speaks loudly to my prideful and selfish heart. guess i just need to get over myself.

Father
i come walking back to You with my head held low and my heart heavy with burden. i surrender my desire to own a guitar to You. i don't want to pick up this burden again. please come and change my heart. let me be grateful for denise who is graciously offering me her guitar. thanks for humbling me to see how selfish and prideful my heart is. i trust that You are drawing me closer to Yourself thru this experience. thanks for supplying all my needs (and some of my wants) by Your gracious hands. You take care of me perfectly. thanks for helping me to live like You. and thanks for giving me a great friend who is willing to love me with Your love. denise rocks!
thru Jesus' Name, i pray ~ Amen

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*audrey *kimberly *kimberly