A little trip

Good morning, welcome back from turkey coma. Hope your holiday was filled with memories and a new insight into where God is leading you.  My heart is filled with thoughts of a new adventure for you. Can you feel it? What's next for you?

In Mark Batterson's book, Wild Goose Chase, he says this, "We start dying when we have nothing with living for. And we don't really start living until we find something with dying for. Ironically, discovering something worth dying for is what makes life worth living."

My prayer for us all is to find that holy passion, and to have to courage to pursue it.

Troy and I are flying out to Austin this weekend. Found some ridiculously cheap airline tickets and a rental car. We're praying for clear vision and a very distinct

Have a great day. Love you.
Tanya

Mission + Vision

Hello,

Good afternoon. Hope you're having a marvelous Monday. It's a bit cool here, 50 degrees, but sunny.

I'm reading a book, God Will Make A Way by Cloud & Townsend. First chapter talks about the importance of believing God will make a way. Here's a quote,  " No matter what limitation or circumstance you find yourself up against in life, there is a God who can empower you and got you to go past what you thought was possible." chapter 2 is talking about the importance of "Surrounding yourself with with spiritually tuned, well-grounded people."

I'm more than grateful for all of your prayers as insight as Troy, I, and the family seek to discover what the next step may be.

Troy and I both feel a tug towards Austin, TX. I've attached a picture which still makes me smile... God writing a sign in the air for me. Troy visited a Austin in June and loved it. He even told me we might move there. Then I started praying for God to put the holy passion in our souls, and begin with Troy. God had already begun with Troy and I was slow to catch on.

So we are exploring some options. Praying for clear direction and wisdom. "Being open", as our pastor challenged us on Sunday, to what Jesus had for us. 

So, as you continue to pray and counsel me, may the Holy Spirit continue to reveal Himself more and more real to all of us.

love you,
Tanya

Become Who You Are

God is definitely trying to teach me something. Two books I've picked up this week have said the same thing: BECOME WHO YOU ARE. So now I'm delving into this identity search.

A Call To Grace, David Nasser
The Truest Thing About You, David Lomas

Its is well

It Is Well

Kristene DiMarco

Grander earth has quaked before
Moved by the sound of His voice
Seas that are shaken and stirred
Can be calmed and broken for my regard

Through it all, through it all
My eyes are on You
Through it all, through it all
It is well
Through it all, through it all
My eyes are on You
It is well with me

Far be it for me to not believe
Even when my eyes can't see
And this mountain that's in front of me
Will be thrown into the midst of sea

So let go my soul and trust in Him
The waves and wind still know His name

It is well with my soul
It is well with my soul
It is well with my soul

It is well, it is well with my soul
It is well, it is well with my soul
It is well, it is well with my soul

Tanya Brown

crafty

http://www.craftsy.com/lecture/welcome-to-your-free-mini-class/1594.html

Anticipation is building...

Can you feel it? Can you sense the anticipation building? I certainly do.

There's a prompting on my life to pounce on a new adventure. I can't avoid it. Seems like every article, blog, book, radio program, etc., that I pick up focuses on discovering what my  passions are and pursuing those passions. It's everywhere! Literally, everywhere. In the middle of the night when I couldn't sleep, I picked up a parenting book from John Maxwell from 1996 called Breakthrough Parenting. I only made it through page 33, but so far it's loud and clear that I need to keep learning. And to do that, I need to figure out what my passions are. (See the trend?)

So how does one figure out what he is passionate about? 

• Listen to what you talk about the most
• Look at your bank account to see where your money is going
• Peruse your bookshelf to see what interests you have
• Think about which websites you spend the most time
• What would you really like to do in the next 5 years
• If money was not an issue, where would you like to be

Check out this personality test: Keirsey Temperment Sorter or this career test: The MAPP Assessment

Indecency in Marriage

Something about Deuteronomy draws me in. Perhaps it's the legal side of the book - all the "you should do this", or "you need to do it". It's pretty black and white for the most part.

But this passage doesn't seem that way. Take a look.

Deut. 24:1-4

If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, 2 and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, 3 and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, 4 then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the Lord. Do not bring sin upon the land the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance.

At first glace it may seem very simple. But then when you dig deeper, there are some questions which arise. 

What could a woman do that is "indecent"?

Who gets to judge the "indecent" behavior?
And because I'm a modern female in a culture where divorce is so prevalent, can a woman divorce her husband for his indecent behavior?

I don't know these answers.

Malachi 2.16

"The man who hates and divorces his wife, " says the Lord, the God of Israel, "does violence to the one he should protect," says the Lord Almighty. So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful.

Let's skip over to the new testament. These guys called "Pharisees" ask the question of our day.

Matthew 19:3-12

3 Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?"

4 "Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,' 5 and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'[b]? 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate."

7 "Why then," they asked, "did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?"

8 Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery."

10 The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry."

11 Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. 12 For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it."

Apparently men in the time of Jesus considered adultery top of the list of sins. Perhaps the men only wanted the benefits of being married and not the commitment of marriage. What does this mean, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry"? Maybe he was getting at the fact that he would prefer to live with a woman instead of marrying her. How do we know exactly what was in his heart? I think he was being honest about a real question he was struggling with in order to find the truth.

But that's not the end. Jesus goes on to tell this little story about eunuchs. Maybe you can explain what he is getting at... the part about some eunuchs were born this way, some were made that way by others, and some just choose to live like eunuchs for the kingdom's sake.

So which one am I? Can I say that I'm born this way, or was I made by others, or do I choose to live a certain way for the Kingdom's sake? I'm not sure about that answer, but I know for me specifically, I choose to be married to Troy. And I was spiritually reborn in Christ who dwells within me, causing me to actually be born into a committed relationship which hates divorce and loves reconciliation. Other relationships which have endured through decades inspire me to continue to make that decision on a daily basis. Our families support us graciously, and give us lots of babysitting so Troy and I can spend one-on-one time together. I guess I have all little of all three eunuch options within me.

planting seeds

I'm a huge Mark Batterson fan.

Quoting him: "Oh that I could pray that the Holy Spirit would come upon us and put upon us this awesome responsibility to plant a seed and remove this awesome burden to be God."

You can listen to the podcast here.

What seeds are you planting?

Same deal, five and half years later

I had to laugh at myself.

As I was reading through an old post from my blog from 2006, I found something interesting. That quote about the Lion Manifesto is the exact quote which I copied into my Evernote this morning from Mark Batterson's blog post from today. 

Think God might be trying to get me to figure that one out? Guess I should take a little more time to read through that one.

Single Mom's Gas Give-Away : May 12

Hey there,

We have an exciting opportunity for any single mom. Our church is giving out FREE gas. On May 12 from 12 - 3 PM, we'll be pumping gas at City on a Hill Church located at 7745 Main Street, Woodstock, GA  30188, next to the Woodstock Library. We'll also be offering things for kids, water, and HOPE. Sometimes when things look bleak, what we need more than anything is to have someone show us that they care. This is what we are trying to do for the single mom's in the Woodstock/Marietta/Canton area.

This is what I need from you: to tell all your friends who are single moms about this event. We are trying to spread the news by word of mouth. We've been asked to not publish any printed advertisements or radio announcements by the county officials who have given us a permit. So basically we're telling everyone we know to tell everyone they know. I believe this could be ever more effecting than printed material. You have influence into your friends' lives. Can you help us spread the word?

You can get more info at Free Gas.

And if you don't have anything going on from Noon to 3 on Saturday, May 12, we would love to see you. We have lots of people involved, but there is always room for one more helping hand. You never know how an event like this can impact someone's life. Troy and I have volunteered for this event for several years now, and each year we hear stores of women who feel hopeless. Then they come to this event, and are renewed with hope to continue living. We'd love to see you there!

Thanks in advance for spreading the word. Let's make someone's day by giving a little hope (and free gas).

For you...

Singleness…

 

They will be my people, and I will be their God. I will give them singleness of heart and action, so that they will always fear me for their own good and the good of their children after them. I will make an everlasting covenant with them: I will never stop doing good to them, and I will inspire them to fear me, so that they will never turn away from me.  Jer. 32:38-40

 

This morning I was praying for my single friends. And as I thought about it, I have lots of female friends who are single. Most of them are over 30, never married, amazing, confident women who are seeking a spouse. They each have super cool personalities, and they are fiercely independent, well-spoken, kind-hearted people. Each of these ladies has been a good friend to me for years. I cherish their friendships and look forward to meeting the guys who will treat them like queens.

 

So I'm praying for these guys, even though I don't know them yet. These guys will be Christ-followers, know the meaning of sacrifice, have ears to listen to what is laying heavy on my friends' hearts. These guys will be adventurous, caring, and kind. They will show gentleness to the broken-hearted, seek the interests of others, and care about their families. They will be committed to marriage and their wives; they will remain faithful until the end.

 

And my friends will be these guys' biggest fan. My friends will cherish their friendships, encourage these guys to strive for excellence – without nagging. They will seek to build up their man like he's prince charming. These ladies will seek to make their husband's happy. These beautiful women will cling to what is good and flee from what is evil and degrading. Their hearts will only be for the one they love.

 

So, God, when are these guys showing up for my friends? My girlfriends are ready to meet these guys!

 

So, friends of mine, keep your eyes open. Make your list of what this guy of your will be like. Seek him out. He's waiting to meet you, too.

Toil is meaniningless

 Work has been so heavy lately. By "heavy" I mean both the amount of workload and it's emotionally taxing. It's year end. That's about all I can say. 

During a brief moment, I had a thought to read a section of Ecclesiastes about finding satisfaction in my work. Unfortunately, I don't. So these verses were a bit discouraging, but hopefully I can get the lesson God is trying to teach me. I feel the same as this writer: working tiresomely to give everything I make to someone else. 

 

Ecc. 2:24-26

 ¹⁷ So I hated life, because the work that is done under the sun was grievous to me. All of it is meaningless, a chasing after the wind. ¹⁸ I hated all the things I had toiled for under the sun, because I must leave them to the one who comes after me. ¹⁹ And who knows whether he will be a wise man or a fool? Yet he will have control over all the work into which I have poured my effort and skill under the sun. This too is meaningless. ²⁰ So my heart began to despair over all my toilsome labor under the sun. ²¹ For a man may do his work with wisdom, knowledge and skill, and then he must leave all he owns to someone who has not worked for it. This too is meaningless and a great misfortune. ²² What does a man get for all the toil and anxious striving with which he labors under the sun? ²³ All his days his work is pain and grief; even at night his mind does not rest. This too is meaningless.

 ²⁴ A man can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in his work. This too, I see, is from the hand of God, ²⁵ for without him, who can eat or find enjoyment? ²⁶ To the man who pleases him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness, but to the sinner he gives the task of gathering and storing up wealth to hand it over to the one who pleases God. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.

 

So I'm seeking the hand of God, calling out to Him to be gracious to me. I want to find satisfaction in what I do, but ultimately I desire to please Him. That's my souls passion. Ken Blanchard in his book called the "One Minute Manager" said this, "People who feel good about themselves produce good results." John Piper in his book called "Desire God" says, "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in him." I see a recurring tend being set.

OK, God, I'm ready... what do You have for me today? 

 

What being married has taught me

Marriage is more about "what am I willing to give up" versus "what can I get out of it".

This is something I did not realize going into this marriage. It's been a steep learning curve for me, but the gracious Lord is continuing to work this lesson my thick heart. It takes work and sacrifice, tears and prayers, and bouncing ideas off of friends. 

Marriage is for those who are willing to find out what needs to change in their lives.

Before I got married, I thought that I had it all together. By being married and adding some kids, I quickly came to realize that I didn't have anything together except being selfish. I wasn't a good lover of people. It's constantly being revealed to me that I need to put my feelings aside and seek out the interests in others. This is the example that Christ gave over and over. I never noticed that in scripture until it's reveal in my own life. Jesus didn't come down here on his own according - it's the will of the One who sent Him. That's a constant sacrifice of desires.

Those are my 2 lessons for today. For anyone looking to commit to being married, these are two lessons I wish someone would have shared with me. If you don't think you'll need to change once you're married - you're deceived. There are always areas in your life which will need to change. You need to be willing to serve your spouse, even when you don't want to. That's a conscious decision - and you'll need to re-affirm that decision each moment you're alive.

So what are you willing to give up in order to serve others? What is God calling you out on? Where is there tension in your relationship - this probably has to do with your unwillingness to budge. 

Daily Challenges

Check out my other blog for daily challenges. There are many updates on that new site. 

unyielding spirit and anxiety

From My Utmost for His Highest, April 7^th:

God cannot reveal anything to us if we don’t have His Spirit. And our own unyielding and headstrong opinions will effectively prevent God from revealing anything to us. But our insensible thinking will end immediately once His resurrection life has its way with us.

 

1 Chron. 22.12-13

May the Lord give you discretion and understanding when he puts you in command over Israel, so that you may keep the law of the Lord your God. Then you will have success if you are careful to observe the decrees and laws that the Lord gave Moses for Israel. Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or discouraged.

 

Amos 3.7

Surely the Sovereign Lord does nothing without revealing his plan to his servants the prophets.

 

1 Cor. 1.9-12

For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you and asking God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding. And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light.

 

Rom. 15.13

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

 

lately i’ve been anxious about so many things. my heart, soul and body are filled with anxiety, worry, fear, etc. i feel as tho i can’t find solstice anywhere. i pray and pray, yet my thoughts focus back on the unrest and trouble happening all around me. i’ve heard 3 sermons about worrying – so i know that God is trying to get me to change...

 

so what motivates my worry/anxiety/fear? first i need to get to the bottow of what is causing so much unrest in my soul.

 

• today the house in flowery branch goes up for auction – april 7^th. the kids are on spring break at deanna’s, and they may not have a house to return to when we take them back on sunday. 
• if the house doesn’t sell for more than the loan amount plus lawyer fees, troy will be expected to pay back the difference. this means he will need to file bankruptcy, which will ruin any chance of us getting a house in the next 5 years.
• i would fight for michael and alex to come and live with us, but troy doesn’t necessarily want that.  in the 3 days that we’ve had them this weekend, i can already tell a difference in their attitude. i feel as though they desperately need stability and structure, in order to develop into confident and mature young men.
• the anxiety which michael and alex bring into our house causes me to feel uneasy and anxious. they both continually are chewing the skin off their fingers, biting their nails, and alex sucks his thumb and twills his hair all the time. this cause troy also to be more antsy, bites his nails and shaking his leg. these little motions reveal so much unrest in their lives. it’s bothersome for me to feel so uneasy around them. there’s not peace, rest, or confidence.
• insecurities drive me crazy. i pray for the kids and troy to overcome their insecurites, so that they can be confident and bold. for me, i have the attitude that i can accomplish anything. too often i feel they fall into the thinking that they might get hurt or something might happen to them. they live in constant fear, and i don’t know how to help with that. the bondage of fear and distrust causes them to miss out on so much happiness, thrill and life.
• michael is getting more and more bullheaded and rebellious, and alex is following in those shoes. the kids lack respect for authority, which drives me crazy. i see more and more how important it is to learn these lessons from our parents on earth so that we know how to respect our Father in heaven. if we can’t accept discipline from our earthly dad, how are we ever going to learn to yield our spirits to our heaven Dad?  how will we know to obey His commands, if we don’t listen to our earthly dad’s requests? [1 john 5.3 this is love for God: to obey His commands.] how does one instill obedience, respect and honor?