I lift up my eyes to the hills— where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.
ps. 121:1-2

He stilled the storm to a whisper; the waves of the sea were hushed.
ps 107.29

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.
ps 147.3

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.
heb. 13.8

I Will Lift My Eyes
Written by Bebo Norman and Jason Ingram

God, my God, I cry out
Your beloved needs You now
God, be near, calm my fear
And take my doubt

Your kindness is what pulls me up
Your love is all that draws me in

I will lift my eyes to the Maker
Of the mountains I can’t climb
I will lift my eyes to the Calmer
Of the oceans raging wild
I will lift my eyes to the Healer
Of the hurt I hold inside
I will lift my eyes, lift my eyes to You

God, my God, let Mercy sing
Her melody over me
God, right here all I bring
Is all of me

‘Cause You are and You were and You will be forever
The Lover I need to save me
‘Cause You fashioned the earth and You hold it together, God
So hold me now

shottie introduced me to this song yesterday. it's pretty much rocking my world.

this verse sums up how i feel today:
"I cry out to you, O God, but you do not answer; I stand up, but you merely look at me." [job 30.20] it feels like i've made myself vulnerable before God, and all He is doing is standing there - staring at me. i'm uncomforable, trembling... but at least He hasn't looked away. our eyes are searing each other's souls and we both refuse to relinguish our gaze. neither of us are blinking. my eyes are burning from being dried out so long. how long will this last, my God?

Each Day's Need

"May he turn our hearts to him, to walk in all his ways and to keep the commands, decrees and regulations he gave our fathers. And may these words of mine, which I have prayed before the LORD, be near to the LORD our God day and night, that he may uphold the cause of his servant and the cause of his people Israel according to each day's need, so that all the peoples of the earth may know that the LORD is God and that there is no other. But your hearts must be fully committed to the LORD our God, to live by his decrees and obey his commands, as at this time."
Solomon's Prayer of Dedication for the Temple [1 Kings 8.58-61]

where to begin? where to begin? solomon, king of israel who was preceded by david - the man after God's heart... he was the chosen one to build the table, a place for God's name to be revered. tho it was a building, solomon knew that God could not be contained within its walls. (The heavens, even the highest heaven, cannot contain You. How much less this temple I have built! 1 kings 8.27) yet it was built for the people to remember how important God must be to each of them. He was to be the center of their community. He was to be the reason why people lived upright lives and brought sacrifices to this temple.

within the words of solomon's prayer, i can hear the heart of a man who knows his weaknesses. he pray again and again for the people to turn their hearts to the Lord, to be fully committed to Him, to live by His decrees and obey His commands. solomon knew the word of God; God spoke directly to him 2 times already. solomon grew up seeing his father run after God. he wasn't without an example of how to live by the commands of God.

so who has been my example? who has taught me to live by the commands of God? who currently holds me accountable to those lofty standards? where do i get my instruction or discipline? i grew up in a small church in south dakota where people learned to seek the truth thru the word. my youth leader (aka the pastor's wife) took me under her wing and mentored me. she was and remains to be a godly woman, someone i look up to and respect. she helped shape who am i and what i stand for. and my grandma tieman taught me the importance of blessing the food, interceding for the needs of others, and attending services. kimberly was and remains to be my nathan, my discipler. she has a way of knowing when i'm tempted and reprimands me for wandering from the chosen path. denise is a constant reminder that i'm beloved, chosen and worthy of the love of Christ. shottie encouranges me to dig deeper, to express my faith in words and be steadfast. juanita's gives grace and understanding. for these women, i'm eternally grateful.

gracious daddy,
thanks for the friends You've given me. i know each of these women has a vital role in Your kingdom and i'm grateful for what they've given to me. thanks for surrounding me with many people who challenge me to seek You deeper, harder, longer, wider. may You continue to turn my heart toward You. may i continue to learn how to obey your decree and commands and love Your word with all my heart.

'Lord, i am willing
-to receive what You give
-to lack what You withhold
-to reliquish what You take
-to suffer what You inflict
-to be what You require'
in Jesus' Name ~ Amen
*denise, juanita, deena, shottie, kimberly

Idolatrous Commotion

"Return, faithless people; I will cure you of backsliding." "Yes, we will come to you, for you are the LORD our God. Surely the idolatrous commotion on the hills and mountains is a deception; surely in the LORD our God is the salvation of Israel.

idolatrous commotion. that's how i would describe much of what i see in the world.
idolatrous: the worship of a physical object as a god
commotion: a condition of civil unrest or confusion
we are all searching for satisfaction. we are born with unrest and a desire to have our longings fulfilled. we can thank eve and adam for that one. and we search high and low to find what gives us the most satisfaction.

so what satisfies me? where do i look to be fulfilled? what have i sought after which left me empty and worse off than when i began my search? who do i expect to fulfill my wants? what do i expect of people? where am i most satisfied in my life? what kind of activities bring me the most joy? i realize these are pretty selfish questions, but without asking, how can i know how to help others find what satisfies their needs? what brings the most joy to people? the commotion from the world is deception. surely the Lord, Yahweh, is our salvation - our hope - our satisfaction. and without Him, we are seeking more commotion instead of peace and satisfaction.

Jesus, You are my hope. as i draw close to You, i know You draw close to me. help me to find what satisfies. open my eyes to know what satisfies You the most.
in Jesus' Name ~ Amen.

*Courtney * Shottie *Jennifer

Do Not Think...

The commandments, "Do not commit adultery," "Do not murder," "Do not steal," "Do not covet," and whatever other commandment there may be, are summed up in this one rule: "Love your neighbor as yourself." Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law. And do this, understanding the present time. The hour has come for you to wake up from your slumber, because our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed. The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light. Let us behave decently, as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy. Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the sinful nature.
rom. 13.

How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word. I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands. I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.
psalm 119.9-11

it's a foreign thought to me that paul had to tell the roman church to refrain from sexual immorality, drunkenness, etc.? i can only imagine what we americans would call that roman church... we think the problems in our churches are bad? i can only imagine my pastor preaching from the pulpit: "people, you need to stop having drunken parties where you end up having sex with one another." that would be the day.

so am i saying that this type of sinful behavior doesn't happen in the church? no, i'm not saying that. i know people who attend church services every sunday, people who struggle with low self-esteem and those who give into peer pressure. sometimes i fall into the catergory. perhaps we need to hear the bold words of paul, 'put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light, and this is what we as the church are going to do to help you along the journey...' i'm guilty of forgetting that last part, "and this is what i'm going to do to help you..." followed up by, 'i'm not going to leave you in the midst of this struggle. together we are going to make it thru."

so what can the church do to better help us along our journey Home? how can the church nuture it's people? (that's been the question on my heart lately.) what can the church do better to get people discussing their daily struggles, instead of feeling guilty of concealing their sin? we all sin - there are none who don't, even tho the people in the church often come across as being 'perfect'. God knows the condition of each of our hearts; we can't conceal our sin from Him.

i'm as guilty as they come about confess my sin to others. (confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. james 5.16) so since paul said to do it, and i'm not doing it, am i sinning by keeping my mouth shut? are we as the church sinning by not offering an environment where people feel comfortable to express their struggles and sins? are we aleinating those who need Jesus?

the psalmist asked a spiritual question, and came up with a 'practical' answer. i'm praying for the same to happen for our church.

Loving Father,
how can we keep our lives pure? only by living according to Your word. let us seek You with all our hearts; don't let us stray from Your commands. let us hide Your word in our hearts that we might not sin against You. let Your words resound thru our minds throughout the day, beckoning us to be pure. just as You calmed the storm for Your disciples, may You calm the storm raging in our hearts. may You transform Your church to be a place for sinners and the sick. may Your healing flood Your church with abundance. may Your Spirit dwell in our hearts as we go to meet Your children. may You teach us to invest in the lives of others. help us to love our neighbors the way You love us. and help us to love You with a steadfast love. break us of the sin of concealing our sin. bring something into Your church to break us from our arrogance. we are not perfect, not put together. sometimes we are lonely. let us be able to express that to one another. help us to confess our sin to You and to others. teach us how to be listeners and communicators of Your truth. teach me to be able to ask questions which enable others to speak their heart openly and honestly. teach me ways to encourage others to open up with me. shine Your truth thru me.
in Jesus' Name ~ Amen.
*Courtney *landra *karensa