Anticipation is building...

Can you feel it? Can you sense the anticipation building? I certainly do.

There's a prompting on my life to pounce on a new adventure. I can't avoid it. Seems like every article, blog, book, radio program, etc., that I pick up focuses on discovering what my  passions are and pursuing those passions. It's everywhere! Literally, everywhere. In the middle of the night when I couldn't sleep, I picked up a parenting book from John Maxwell from 1996 called Breakthrough Parenting. I only made it through page 33, but so far it's loud and clear that I need to keep learning. And to do that, I need to figure out what my passions are. (See the trend?)

So how does one figure out what he is passionate about? 

• Listen to what you talk about the most
• Look at your bank account to see where your money is going
• Peruse your bookshelf to see what interests you have
• Think about which websites you spend the most time
• What would you really like to do in the next 5 years
• If money was not an issue, where would you like to be

Check out this personality test: Keirsey Temperment Sorter or this career test: The MAPP Assessment

Indecency in Marriage

Something about Deuteronomy draws me in. Perhaps it's the legal side of the book - all the "you should do this", or "you need to do it". It's pretty black and white for the most part.

But this passage doesn't seem that way. Take a look.

Deut. 24:1-4

If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, 2 and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, 3 and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, 4 then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the Lord. Do not bring sin upon the land the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance.

At first glace it may seem very simple. But then when you dig deeper, there are some questions which arise. 

What could a woman do that is "indecent"?

Who gets to judge the "indecent" behavior?
And because I'm a modern female in a culture where divorce is so prevalent, can a woman divorce her husband for his indecent behavior?

I don't know these answers.

Malachi 2.16

"The man who hates and divorces his wife, " says the Lord, the God of Israel, "does violence to the one he should protect," says the Lord Almighty. So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful.

Let's skip over to the new testament. These guys called "Pharisees" ask the question of our day.

Matthew 19:3-12

3 Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?"

4 "Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,' 5 and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'[b]? 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate."

7 "Why then," they asked, "did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?"

8 Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery."

10 The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry."

11 Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. 12 For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others—and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it."

Apparently men in the time of Jesus considered adultery top of the list of sins. Perhaps the men only wanted the benefits of being married and not the commitment of marriage. What does this mean, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry"? Maybe he was getting at the fact that he would prefer to live with a woman instead of marrying her. How do we know exactly what was in his heart? I think he was being honest about a real question he was struggling with in order to find the truth.

But that's not the end. Jesus goes on to tell this little story about eunuchs. Maybe you can explain what he is getting at... the part about some eunuchs were born this way, some were made that way by others, and some just choose to live like eunuchs for the kingdom's sake.

So which one am I? Can I say that I'm born this way, or was I made by others, or do I choose to live a certain way for the Kingdom's sake? I'm not sure about that answer, but I know for me specifically, I choose to be married to Troy. And I was spiritually reborn in Christ who dwells within me, causing me to actually be born into a committed relationship which hates divorce and loves reconciliation. Other relationships which have endured through decades inspire me to continue to make that decision on a daily basis. Our families support us graciously, and give us lots of babysitting so Troy and I can spend one-on-one time together. I guess I have all little of all three eunuch options within me.

planting seeds

I'm a huge Mark Batterson fan.

Quoting him: "Oh that I could pray that the Holy Spirit would come upon us and put upon us this awesome responsibility to plant a seed and remove this awesome burden to be God."

You can listen to the podcast here.

What seeds are you planting?

Same deal, five and half years later

I had to laugh at myself.

As I was reading through an old post from my blog from 2006, I found something interesting. That quote about the Lion Manifesto is the exact quote which I copied into my Evernote this morning from Mark Batterson's blog post from today. 

Think God might be trying to get me to figure that one out? Guess I should take a little more time to read through that one.

Single Mom's Gas Give-Away : May 12

Hey there,

We have an exciting opportunity for any single mom. Our church is giving out FREE gas. On May 12 from 12 - 3 PM, we'll be pumping gas at City on a Hill Church located at 7745 Main Street, Woodstock, GA  30188, next to the Woodstock Library. We'll also be offering things for kids, water, and HOPE. Sometimes when things look bleak, what we need more than anything is to have someone show us that they care. This is what we are trying to do for the single mom's in the Woodstock/Marietta/Canton area.

This is what I need from you: to tell all your friends who are single moms about this event. We are trying to spread the news by word of mouth. We've been asked to not publish any printed advertisements or radio announcements by the county officials who have given us a permit. So basically we're telling everyone we know to tell everyone they know. I believe this could be ever more effecting than printed material. You have influence into your friends' lives. Can you help us spread the word?

You can get more info at Free Gas.

And if you don't have anything going on from Noon to 3 on Saturday, May 12, we would love to see you. We have lots of people involved, but there is always room for one more helping hand. You never know how an event like this can impact someone's life. Troy and I have volunteered for this event for several years now, and each year we hear stores of women who feel hopeless. Then they come to this event, and are renewed with hope to continue living. We'd love to see you there!

Thanks in advance for spreading the word. Let's make someone's day by giving a little hope (and free gas).

For you...

Singleness…

 

They will be my people, and I will be their God. I will give them singleness of heart and action, so that they will always fear me for their own good and the good of their children after them. I will make an everlasting covenant with them: I will never stop doing good to them, and I will inspire them to fear me, so that they will never turn away from me.  Jer. 32:38-40

 

This morning I was praying for my single friends. And as I thought about it, I have lots of female friends who are single. Most of them are over 30, never married, amazing, confident women who are seeking a spouse. They each have super cool personalities, and they are fiercely independent, well-spoken, kind-hearted people. Each of these ladies has been a good friend to me for years. I cherish their friendships and look forward to meeting the guys who will treat them like queens.

 

So I'm praying for these guys, even though I don't know them yet. These guys will be Christ-followers, know the meaning of sacrifice, have ears to listen to what is laying heavy on my friends' hearts. These guys will be adventurous, caring, and kind. They will show gentleness to the broken-hearted, seek the interests of others, and care about their families. They will be committed to marriage and their wives; they will remain faithful until the end.

 

And my friends will be these guys' biggest fan. My friends will cherish their friendships, encourage these guys to strive for excellence – without nagging. They will seek to build up their man like he's prince charming. These ladies will seek to make their husband's happy. These beautiful women will cling to what is good and flee from what is evil and degrading. Their hearts will only be for the one they love.

 

So, God, when are these guys showing up for my friends? My girlfriends are ready to meet these guys!

 

So, friends of mine, keep your eyes open. Make your list of what this guy of your will be like. Seek him out. He's waiting to meet you, too.

Toil is meaniningless

 Work has been so heavy lately. By "heavy" I mean both the amount of workload and it's emotionally taxing. It's year end. That's about all I can say. 

During a brief moment, I had a thought to read a section of Ecclesiastes about finding satisfaction in my work. Unfortunately, I don't. So these verses were a bit discouraging, but hopefully I can get the lesson God is trying to teach me. I feel the same as this writer: working tiresomely to give everything I make to someone else. 

 

Ecc. 2:24-26

 ¹⁷ So I hated life, because the work that is done under the sun was grievous to me. All of it is meaningless, a chasing after the wind. ¹⁸ I hated all the things I had toiled for under the sun, because I must leave them to the one who comes after me. ¹⁹ And who knows whether he will be a wise man or a fool? Yet he will have control over all the work into which I have poured my effort and skill under the sun. This too is meaningless. ²⁰ So my heart began to despair over all my toilsome labor under the sun. ²¹ For a man may do his work with wisdom, knowledge and skill, and then he must leave all he owns to someone who has not worked for it. This too is meaningless and a great misfortune. ²² What does a man get for all the toil and anxious striving with which he labors under the sun? ²³ All his days his work is pain and grief; even at night his mind does not rest. This too is meaningless.

 ²⁴ A man can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in his work. This too, I see, is from the hand of God, ²⁵ for without him, who can eat or find enjoyment? ²⁶ To the man who pleases him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness, but to the sinner he gives the task of gathering and storing up wealth to hand it over to the one who pleases God. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind.

 

So I'm seeking the hand of God, calling out to Him to be gracious to me. I want to find satisfaction in what I do, but ultimately I desire to please Him. That's my souls passion. Ken Blanchard in his book called the "One Minute Manager" said this, "People who feel good about themselves produce good results." John Piper in his book called "Desire God" says, "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in him." I see a recurring tend being set.

OK, God, I'm ready... what do You have for me today? 

 

What being married has taught me

Marriage is more about "what am I willing to give up" versus "what can I get out of it".

This is something I did not realize going into this marriage. It's been a steep learning curve for me, but the gracious Lord is continuing to work this lesson my thick heart. It takes work and sacrifice, tears and prayers, and bouncing ideas off of friends. 

Marriage is for those who are willing to find out what needs to change in their lives.

Before I got married, I thought that I had it all together. By being married and adding some kids, I quickly came to realize that I didn't have anything together except being selfish. I wasn't a good lover of people. It's constantly being revealed to me that I need to put my feelings aside and seek out the interests in others. This is the example that Christ gave over and over. I never noticed that in scripture until it's reveal in my own life. Jesus didn't come down here on his own according - it's the will of the One who sent Him. That's a constant sacrifice of desires.

Those are my 2 lessons for today. For anyone looking to commit to being married, these are two lessons I wish someone would have shared with me. If you don't think you'll need to change once you're married - you're deceived. There are always areas in your life which will need to change. You need to be willing to serve your spouse, even when you don't want to. That's a conscious decision - and you'll need to re-affirm that decision each moment you're alive.

So what are you willing to give up in order to serve others? What is God calling you out on? Where is there tension in your relationship - this probably has to do with your unwillingness to budge. 

Daily Challenges

Check out my other blog for daily challenges. There are many updates on that new site. 

unyielding spirit and anxiety

From My Utmost for His Highest, April 7^th:

God cannot reveal anything to us if we don’t have His Spirit. And our own unyielding and headstrong opinions will effectively prevent God from revealing anything to us. But our insensible thinking will end immediately once His resurrection life has its way with us.

 

1 Chron. 22.12-13

May the Lord give you discretion and understanding when he puts you in command over Israel, so that you may keep the law of the Lord your God. Then you will have success if you are careful to observe the decrees and laws that the Lord gave Moses for Israel. Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or discouraged.

 

Amos 3.7

Surely the Sovereign Lord does nothing without revealing his plan to his servants the prophets.

 

1 Cor. 1.9-12

For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you and asking God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding. And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light.

 

Rom. 15.13

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

 

lately i’ve been anxious about so many things. my heart, soul and body are filled with anxiety, worry, fear, etc. i feel as tho i can’t find solstice anywhere. i pray and pray, yet my thoughts focus back on the unrest and trouble happening all around me. i’ve heard 3 sermons about worrying – so i know that God is trying to get me to change...

 

so what motivates my worry/anxiety/fear? first i need to get to the bottow of what is causing so much unrest in my soul.

 

• today the house in flowery branch goes up for auction – april 7^th. the kids are on spring break at deanna’s, and they may not have a house to return to when we take them back on sunday. 
• if the house doesn’t sell for more than the loan amount plus lawyer fees, troy will be expected to pay back the difference. this means he will need to file bankruptcy, which will ruin any chance of us getting a house in the next 5 years.
• i would fight for michael and alex to come and live with us, but troy doesn’t necessarily want that.  in the 3 days that we’ve had them this weekend, i can already tell a difference in their attitude. i feel as though they desperately need stability and structure, in order to develop into confident and mature young men.
• the anxiety which michael and alex bring into our house causes me to feel uneasy and anxious. they both continually are chewing the skin off their fingers, biting their nails, and alex sucks his thumb and twills his hair all the time. this cause troy also to be more antsy, bites his nails and shaking his leg. these little motions reveal so much unrest in their lives. it’s bothersome for me to feel so uneasy around them. there’s not peace, rest, or confidence.
• insecurities drive me crazy. i pray for the kids and troy to overcome their insecurites, so that they can be confident and bold. for me, i have the attitude that i can accomplish anything. too often i feel they fall into the thinking that they might get hurt or something might happen to them. they live in constant fear, and i don’t know how to help with that. the bondage of fear and distrust causes them to miss out on so much happiness, thrill and life.
• michael is getting more and more bullheaded and rebellious, and alex is following in those shoes. the kids lack respect for authority, which drives me crazy. i see more and more how important it is to learn these lessons from our parents on earth so that we know how to respect our Father in heaven. if we can’t accept discipline from our earthly dad, how are we ever going to learn to yield our spirits to our heaven Dad?  how will we know to obey His commands, if we don’t listen to our earthly dad’s requests? [1 john 5.3 this is love for God: to obey His commands.] how does one instill obedience, respect and honor?

2008 new year's resolutions is to get back to this blog. i have missed you, 7 day holy.

hey - sorry for the lack of posts on this blog. i've not died, nor have i abandon ship. take a little journey with me to this blog to see what's happening in my world.

God Come by Shane & Shane

Come meet us
King Jesus
Oh wind of change
Blow through the temple

Sweet Spirit of God
Come mend our hearts
For all we have are songs
Unless You come

Awaken what's inside of me
Tune my heart to all You are in me
Even though You're here
God come

May the vision of You be the death of me
And even though You've given everything
Jesus come

Here we are, Lord
In this place
Crying out for
Your embrace

To hear Your voice, God
More than songs
Please come...

The Reality is Found in Christ

Since you died with Christ to the basic principles of this world, why, as though you still belonged to it, do you submit to its rules: "Do not handle! Do not taste! Do not touch!"? These are all destined to perish with use, because they are based on human commands and teachings. Such regulations indeed have an appearance of wisdom, with their self-imposed worship, their false humility and their harsh treatment of the body, but they lack any value in restraining sensual indulgence.
col. 2.21-23

These are a shadow of the things that were to come; the reality, however, is found in Christ.
col. 2.17

last weekend i attended a training for The Truth Project. click on the link for more info. the teacher, Del Tackett, has amazing ability to communicate. since the training, different thoughts/ideas have come to mind regarding this training. it's the universal issue of good versus evil: to know the difference, we need to find what the Truth is. where is the Truth found? why is it important to know the Truth? does everyone question the Truth? how does knowing the Truth help to communicate Christ to the nations? how does knowing the Truth affect us on an everday basis? does it affect our views on sociology, theology, economics, community, etc.? i'm learning that knowing the Truth, God's Truth, does affect every area of our lives because it transforms the way we think. (rom. 12:2)

because of the training, i'm more apt to look for Truth in scripture. i realize that what Paul was referring to when he said, 'do not handle, taste or touch' were 'what you eat or drink, or with regard to a religious festival, a New Moon celebration or a Sabbath day.' (col. 2.16) what in my life do i continue to obey which is the old law instead of the Spirit of Truth? what have i learned along the way that is law-abiding instead of Spirit-inspired? what do i hold onto that has an appearance of wisdom, with its self-imposed worship, its false humility and its harsh treatment of the body, but it lacks any value in restraining sensual indulenge? what has power to restrain sensual indulenge?

man, i wish i could think deeper than my carnal self. i know that i have answers to these questions...

i'm really trying to give time for these questions to set it. starting with the last question, about 'restraining sensual indulence'. my thoughts go two ways: the first, 'when i'm tempted, what do i do?', and secondly, 'is the church equipping me to restrain sensual indulence?'
*what do i do: after thinking for too long about the temptation, my spirit kicks in and pushes me to pray or read some verses - trying to get my focus from me to Christ. i seldom (if ever) tell my friends what i'm struggling with. i have great friends who would do whatever they could to help, but i don't depend on them for this type of support. (not sure why i added that, but it just kinda typed itself.)
is the church equipping its members to restrain sensual indulgence: somewhere along the way, i had to learn that when tempted i needed to shift my focus from me to Christ. (my initial answer was 'no', but the more i thought about it, my answer changed.) what am i, a member of the church, doing to equip others to restrain sensual indulgence... that's a tough question. know the Truth and it will set you free, be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

somewhere along my journey, Christ revealed Himself to me. He's used people to teach me how to seek Him, who is the answer to every question. He equips, He sustains, He never lets go or leaves us. He sent His Spirit to lead us deeper into 'reality', and away from the virtual. i'm learning that because i think or feel something, that is may not be the Truth. the Truth is Jesus, and that reality is found in Christ. I'm learning that the more i study the Bible, the more knowledge i have on people's natures, community, the reason so many people are broken and in need of the Truth. we, as a people, have been lied to from birth. we are not unworthy, useless, unloved. the Truth is we are loved, worthy, and a people of purpose.

i'm praying for an opportunity to lead/be a participant in this Truth Project. it's a study that begins and ends in the Truth.

Jesus,
You are the Truth. sometimes is building within me to know more and more Truth. i pray for You to give it to me, and not just me, but give it to the all the people. we all need to know this Truth. so much of the teaching i hear today involves emotions and feelings, but i know there is so much more to You. i'm rejoicing that this Truth has come into my life. my reality is found in You - guide me deeper into You to know reality. don't let me be deceived any longer. Spirit of Truth, let me see where i've follow the customs of this age, instead of following Your teaching. if i'm pursuing anything that holds an appearance of wisdom with its self-imposed worship, please reveal this to me. i've died with Jesus to the basic principles of this world. remind me of this when i return to them - that they are not part of who i am any longer. they've been dealt with on the cross and have no power over me. You made a public spectacle of them. You give new meaning to "let Truth reign". i'm letting Your reign in my life. i'm surrendering toYou. again, i'm humbled and amazed at how You bring to light and expose the lies. i'm praying for You to prepare others to be involved in this Truth project. may You open my eyes to see whom You are drawing to this study. i'm praying for 8 people, tho i don't know who You are going to choose. You chose me before i chose You, that's what i know. that's my reality. thanks for choosing me.
in Christ's Name ~ amen
*Tricia *Darcy *Jon

Discipline and Punishment

Fathers shall not be put to death for their children, nor children put to death for their fathers; each is to die for his own sin.
deut. 24.16

And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, "The LORD, the LORD, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation."
Ex. 34.6-8

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
Heb. 12.11

i can't help but have interest in the battle in darfur. children soldiers, holy war, rebellion, separation from Christ. people are dying for a cause that most of can't comprehend. what are these rebels trying to prove? why are they fighting? why are they killing children and raping women? what causes a group of rebels to do these things? are they fighting for peace? I don't know exactly, but i'm saddened by the events which have taken place.

'each is to die for his own sin.' there seems to be some accountability in that statement. but what about these families near darfur who have become fatherless and widowed? i bet they feel like a piece of them have died because of this war. are they feeling disciplined - certainly it doesn't seem pleasant, but painful. i can only imagine the depth of their pain. it breaks my heart to think of how terribly they feel - to live in those conditions. but then this new testament verse goes on to say, 'later on it produces a harvest of righteouness and peace for those who have been trained by it.' this isn't for those who harbor the bitterness and revenge, but for those who have been trained by grace and forgiveness. those who know that God is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands and forgiving wickedness. just think about how difficult it would be to forgive the rebels how raped you and your daughters, killed your husband and forced your sons to become slave-militants. is there such a forgiveness? does it exist? who's bold enough to preach this type of God? who is taking the good news to those who need it most? he who has been forgiven much, loves much. that's Jesus' lesson. ask the woman caught in adultery. ask paul. if someone were to ask me what has been forgiven in my life and how has it affected who i am, what would i answer? how am i being trained to produce a harvest of righteousness and peace? how abundant is my harvest - is it a bumper crop? what proof is there that i am being trained?

gracious God,
i trust that You are disciplining me from my flesh. continue to separate/divide me from who i was. there is a change in my life that i can't explain. i'm learning who i am, as oppose to who i was before i surrendered my life to You. have You way in me. Holy Spirit, i lay down my will and offer it to You; be glorified in me. let this year produce a bumper crop - only thru You am i capable of remaining faithful and able to produce anything good. let Your peace dwell in me that it may overflow and produce praise and good fruit.
in Jesus' Name ~ Amen
*Amanda *Melissa *Laura